Wow. That’s all, just wow. My mind is blown, and I’m not sure I could ever adequately thank everyone enough for the tremendous love and support you have shown over the last 24 hours since I wrote the blog below.
Hitting post wasn’t easy. You can’t take these things back once they’re out there, I know that. I guess I just weighed any worries I had against the prospect of possibly helping even one person. That’s all it took. I am SO thrilled to share that I have heard from people literally all around the world, and I’ve been brought to tears more than once, reading their stories. I have posted it everywhere I can think of – LOL – facebook, twitter, you name it. I’m not stopping to think about who might see it, or what they might think of me. It just doesn’t matter. I think about after I had my son (who is now 2) and how alone I felt. I wish I’d had the courage then to address what was happening and deal with it. I just didn’t know, or maybe I didn’t want to know? I think I would have spared myself, and likely my husband, a lot of pain and stress had I done so.
Everyone’s story is different… whether you work full time and have kids, or you’re a single mom (which I have also been), or maybe you’re at home and are still fighting to keep your head above water. We all struggle in our own way and for me personally I think that I had a lot of guilt about how I was feeling. How could I feel so lost and overwhelmed when I don’t even WORK? Which of course, we all know is BS.. I work and I work damn hard! But not having a conventional job outside the house seems to translate into an easy existence in most peoples’ opinions.
I am very lucky, I know that. I always wanted to stay home with my kids. I worked until my oldest daughter was 5 and when I married my husband I became pregnant immediately and was able to be home from that time on. I’m grateful every day for him and how hard he works so that our kids can have me home with them. I know they love having me here and during the dark moments I remind myself of that, and of how much I adore them. They are my happy place.
Please feel free to share this blog with anyone you like. I’m pouring my heart out in hopes that it reaches someone who needs to see it. I welcome your comments; I look forward to hearing your stories and to sharing more of this journey as I go.
Much love & many thanks,